My husband wants more kids, are my conditions unreasonable?
When I met my husband I was a fence sitter. Over time I warmed up the idea and decided I’d be okay with one baby. Husband wanted three, but was glad I was open to one. We got married and after a year of trying I got pregnant with my little girl who is due in June.
Now tell me why this man is watching me suffer and is already talking about a second baby?? We had discussed right before I got pregnant that I MIGHT do two, but we don’t know what pregnancy and parenthood will be like and I’m not rushing to make that decision before we see what life is like with a baby.
He keeps saying the baby needs a sibling and he really wants a boy and a girl. I thought on it and decided under certain conditions I could be open to one more, definitely not three.
My conditions: 1. We must be comfortable with the political and economical climate at the time specifically in regard to women’s rights and maternal rights.
After breast feeding husband pays for a breast lift and tummy tuck if needed.
He must be okay with stopping at 2 even if we have another daughter. By stopping at 2 I mean he will get a vasectomy.
Husband is willing to accept 1-2 and says even if it’s another girl he’d gladly stop at 2 babies so she can have a sibling.
However, he says he will not get a vasectomy. I explained in detail how it’s reversible and much safer than me getting my tubes tied. He insists we can continue to use condoms and plan B as needed. I told him currently in the USA they are working to ban birth control, abortion, and plan b and we will have no fall back if I get pregnant at 40 which we both agree we wouldn’t want another kid at that age.
Is this unreasonable? He says he doesn’t want to mess with his downstairs and I rolled my eyes and reminded him what I’m doing to my body for us to have a child.
My husband has been kind and taken good care of me through this, but I feel I’ve compromised a lot and met him half way on our ideals with what our family will be like. Is a vasectomy really asking too much??
Edit: I’d like to point out as there seems to be some confusion. I’d never force my husband to have a vasectomy. It’s simply a condition if he wants a second child which is something he wants.