The Five Most Annoying Marvel Rivals Characters
Jeff
Duh-dun.
Duh-dun.
Duh-dun-dun-duh... splash.
“Dammit, Jeff!”
Every time I hear that sound, I know my peaceful gaming session is about to go straight to hell. There’s no strategy, no counterplay — just Jeff being Jeff.
Jeff isn’t just annoying; Jeff is annoying materialized. He’s hard to shoot — he can swim up walls — and he always hits his ult at the absolute worst times.
F*ck Jeff.
Wolverine
If you’ve ever wondered what it feels like to be chased by a serial killer, let me introduce you to Wolverine — Marvel Rivals’ resident psychopath.
His claws? Pure Michael Myers energy.
His fuzzy face? Somehow makes it worse.
And once he’s locked on you? Forget it. He’ll chase you down like it’s his life’s mission.
No matter how far you run — no matter how well you hide— there’s always that moment when you turn a corner and he’s right there, waiting for you.
Squirrel Girl
Walmart Legend Squirrel Girl has you going nuts.
You’re minding your own business, pushing forward with your team, when suddenly — bam... bam... bam...
Nuts are everywhere, and you can’t heal.
It’s like stepping into a warzone where the landmines are acorns.
The worst part of Squirrel Girl is her Squirrel Stampede.
There you are — a 275-pound Thor — getting run down by some squirrels.
It’s humiliating on the deepest level and somehow makes you feel like a birdfeeder.
Moon Knight
The MOOOON is rising...
Noooo!!!
You know it’s bad when your team collectively panics at the sight of Moon Knight.
You’ll be confidently advancing, thinking you’ve got this match in the bag — and then bam, your health bar plummets faster than your self-esteem on karaoke night.
You spin around to see what hit you — but no, there’s nothing. Just some random guy picking his nose and Namor doing unspeakable things with his squids.
But then you see him — Batman… sorry, Moon Knight. His smug little mask barely visible as he vanishes into the shadows.
A good Moon Knight can wipe your entire team faster than you can say, “I’ll switch to support.”
Spider-Man
Your friendly neighborhood... pain in the ass.
You’re focused on the objective, ready to claim victory, when you hear it — a distant cry from your backline.
“HELP! SPIDE—" Silence.
You spin around, but all you see is your teammate’s ID fading like a bad memory. And then...
There he is.
Spider-Man — zipping around like a caffeinated mosquito, flipping through the air, landing punches that feel way stronger than anything a guy in pajamas should be capable of.
I don’t mind losing a fair fight...
But losing to Spider-Man? Nah. That’s where I draw the line.
The man is not only impossible to kill, but somehow, his uppercut hits harder than the Hulk — which is just disrespectful. I mean, I can accept getting bodied by a super soldier.
But Spider-Man? This skinny kid from Queens just knocked me back to the lobby.
Who am I missing?