So frustrated and sad

This might be a long post so sorry in advance. My bf has maintained that he is porn free for quite a while ( months) but our bedroom life hasn’t really improved. He still has PIED. He started seeing a cast 2 weeks ago which I was happy about but refuses SA meetings bc he says they are creepy. We have qustodio on devices. This past weekend we got into a fight that was unrelated to porn but he slept in the guest room. The next day we were trying to talk it out and apologize and I initiated sex and was rejected. He had an erection at the time so I didn’t understand why. Then he admitted to masturbating the night before 3 times and said he worried he would go soft. The masturbation is a no for me and he knows this. He also admitted that he was imagining porn scenes. Then… after prodding more he fessed up that he had been using Facebook for sexual content and masturbating “occasionally “ to that. I was furious. He immediately deactivated facebook and I blocked it on qustodio. He did this without me asking but I just can’t get over it. I have been questioning if he was using some kind of loophole for months bc I haven’t seen much improvement in the bedroom. He admitted that he gaslit the fuck out of me over and over. He had another CSAT appointment but I don’t know what the hell to do. Now is is love bombing which always feels nice but I know it is manipulative. I keep crying telling him that he has ruined sex for me. I can’t enjoy it even when he does maintain an erection because I do not feel beautiful anymore. I used to feel like a goddess during sex. Now I feel disgusting and I know he is probably thinking about porn. I really love him but I am just sooo freaking tired. I am hoping the csat will help but I am not sure how much more I can take.