Update- I finally left my husband.

Not sure if anyone will care, but I've found myself thinking about this post a lot and wanted to give an update.

I posted here around 9 months ago about leaving my husband after finding out he had been cheating on me. The first few months were hard. I tried to maintain a friendship with him for the sake of our son but just found myself getting hurt over and over again, so I distanced myself and after a while I decided to get on a dating app (mostly to keep my mind off of him).

I met someone and we connected instantly (I'll call him Matt). We texted and talked for a week before meeting in person. I didn't think it would be serious, I just wanted to get out of the house and have some fun. Turns out, he's an amazing man. I didn't even know people like him existed. He's sweet and thoughtful. He makes me laugh until I can't breathe. He's understanding, supportive and actually LISTENS when I talk to him. He's a parent too and loves his kids more than anything.

I've now been dating Matt for 6 months and I don't think I've ever been this happy in my life. I look back at my marriage with Kyle in disbelief.. How did I not notice how terrible he was for SO LONG? Matt brings me flowers and surprises me with date nights and little gifts just to show he was thinking about me when we aren't together. Despite living an hour away, he brings food to me and my son when we are sick. If I'm having a bad day, he lets me talk his ear off and drops off my favorite sweets at my house. Matt is an amazing cook and we trade off nights in the kitchen. When it's my turn to cook he spends quality time with the kids. The laughter in the house is almost constant. This is so far off from what my life was with Kyle. My ex only sees our son about 4 days a month and is constantly finding excuses to leave him with me or drop him off with his grandparents for the weekend. Being with a man who loves his kids AND mine has really opened my eyes to what kind of a "father" Kyle is.

Matt and I don't live together. He spends a lot of time at my house because my home is bigger (it accommodates all of us better than his house) and I have my son almost every day. Despite not living with me, he helps clean, does laundry and helps fix things around the house. He always comments that I don't let him do enough, but he does more for me than anyone ever has in my life. He picks me up and takes on so much that he doesn't HAVE to, but he does it with a smile on his face. He never lets a day pass without telling me how much he loves and appreciates me.

I have learned from my past and won't be moving in with anyone any time soon. I was fooled once, and that won't happen again. Neither Matt or I want any more kids, so we are happy with the way our life is now. No pressure, just living our lives happily alongside each other with our kids.

To everyone out there who hopes your partner will change and "grow up". They won't, and most likely never will. Find someone who makes you happy because they want to, not because you're begging them to. There are good people out there.