Would you date someone who was primarily sexually attracted to people half his age?

My boyfriend identifies as a daddy Dom, he’s in his mid 40’s. He’s been exploring kink and open relationships for the last few years. We met in a kinky way, and quickly realized we had a lot of long term partnership material. (Shared interests, similar places in life, ease of spending time together, deep attraction, joy, appreciation and affection.) I really love him as a person, and also want to protect my heart and be realistic and pay attention to the big picture.

He is very much into the DDLG kink, and has dated many women in their early to mid 20’s, practicing DDLG, some 24/7. Is this irl age gap common in healthy DDLG dynamics? Or turning a kink fantasy into real life?

I’m a couple years older than him, submissive and monogamous, and very much needing to form emotional security and a base of relational maturity that we didn’t take time to do in the beginning. So I’m looking at some of the reasons emotional safety feels lacking for me after 5 months. (We are in a monogamous relationship)

Though I know he’s very attracted to me, he also says things like: I was telling my buddy how hot it is that you’re a couple years older than me, but look 10 years younger! (Ummm… thanks… 🤨… you know I’m going to age right?)

He is an artist, and when he draws women, they are very much the societally programmed ideal aesthetic of young, thin, toned, etc. Those were the majority of his likes on FetLife as well.

He seems highly conditioned by male gaze culture and and definitely gets an ego boost by having/getting hot young women. When his friend expressed discomfort with his kinky life, he said they were probably just jealous cause they are married and can’t get the young hotties anymore.

He has also mentioned that he’d be fine in an open relationship with me, which as a deeply devoted feminine when in committed love partnership, (especially with submission) absolutely blows my mind, and is confusing. (Though he says he’s also happy to be monogamous, because our relationship and being with me, feels really good to him)

I guess I’m just trying to suss out from those more experienced than myself, and maybe in community, is it normal/ok to be doing DDLG with partners with such a big age gap? Is that too many power dynamics to be considered responsible?

His primary attraction and value on youthful looks and sexualized conventional beauty makes me a bit uneasy. As well as his choices in who to engage with before we met, as some did not end well, as he was not aware of the psychological bonding that can happen and his last partner got very attached even though it was long term, but casual for him.

I very naturally fall into the other side of the strong caregiver dynamic in relationship. Though don’t necessarily have a label for it. I know I will always embody that in my dynamics, but am noticing what a relief it would be to be in relationship with someone who was primarily attracted to people my age, and saw maturity as a hot, beautiful and sexy process. The top PHub search this year was MILF! ☺️

Believe it or not, I know a lot of men that are actively NOT attracted to societal beauty, and find depth, personality, and the interior human to be the turn ons, (for real!) rather than appreciating women in the world, largely through a visual, sexualized and external lens.

I’d really appreciate thoughts, advice or relevant experience to share.