As a woman from Kollam, Ponman really hit hard.

The movie felt so relatable, the way people accept that dowry is an inevitable fact of life, and the amount of stress it causes the bride's family. Kollam really was the best district to be chosen for the movie. My mother was from somewhere where it isn't the norm for such huge amounts to be given as dowry. She heard a lot of snide comments from my paternal grandparents for that, their justification being that they had to spend the same for their daughters, just like in the movie. And yet, neither of them really prioritised making their daughters independent enough to earn for themselves, instead just looked for husbands with government jobs. Unlike my maternal grandparents who made sure to make my mother self reliant. But if course her in laws didn't value that.

The scene with Stephy and her sister in law was similar to a conversation my mother had with my aunt. Back then, her fiance's (now my uncle) family made a huge drama over the dowry amount and put them through a lot of stress. And when my mother asked her if she liked the guy, she replied that among all her prospects, he was the one she liked the least.

My aunt appreciated the movie on social media so I'm sure it must have hit hard for her. She prioritises her daughter's education over any savings for her marriage now so I'm sure she will end up breaking the cycle.

Edit: Didn't expect this post to get this much attention. I had made it in a spur of a moment after watching the movie, but now I feel like I generalised and stereotyped an entire district based on my personal experiences. Just giving a disclaimer that this is just from what I've seen around me, and from the experiences of my friends and relatives from other districts as well. I've seen from the comments that it's different in different circles, so sorry about generalising.