Struggling with a new baby , mom guilt and fellowship
I’m back from maternity leave at 7 weeks to work and it’s just so hard. I finally got the rhythm of adding pumps to my schedule which is still really hard but I’m trying to prioritize it even if it pisses some people
But I feel incredibly guilty and sad about leaving my baby. I leave early in the morning, come back late evenings and by the time he is so tired from the day. I basically get no time to play with him. I do the nights just so I can bond with him (husband does 10pm to 1 am and me after) but most of that time is baby sleeping or crying or feeding . There is no play time or fun time. When he finally wakes up in the morning, when he is happy and playful, it’s time to leave. And when I come back, he is tired or I don’t know angry at me for leaving him. He doesn’t smile , doesn’t coo and I’m also quite exhausted by then.
Can anyone who went to work soon provide me any reassurance? Will the baby hate me ? Will we ever bond ?