Divorced Finalized Last week..here’s what I learned:

Dates: separated June 22, Filed July 23, Finalized Feb 24. Married 9 years.

One: I won’t get any law advice only to say that if she says she’s leaving, believe her. There will be no fairy tale ending. If it’s in her interest, she will drag it out and string you along. Stand up for what you want and need, but do so in a fair and decent manner. It goes smooth as it can if both parties can work together.

Second, you will survive, and probably thrive. I know it seems bleak when everything you worked for and focused on is taken from you. But you will survive. I have taken countless advise nuggets from this forum, and others out there to help. You cannot only survive but probably thrive without the anchor of a bad marriage dragging you down. For the first time in 10 plus years I make decision based on what I want, and what my kids need, not what the “couple” need, which is more like what she needs.

Third; forgive yourself, forgive her and step out into this great wide open future. Hold your kids close and make them your center and main priority. Be the person that they can depend on and go to when they need guidance and love….Nothing else matters.

Thanks guys and stay strong.