Nearing the end of my rope

I don't even know what to write. The story is too long to tell. I tried to initiate tonight and she said no, but she'd "be up for a cuddle". I said, "a no phone cuddle?"

Silence.

Waited for her to finish her bedtime ritual so I could at least feel human connection for a moment. Right as she is finally laying down she says, "does that mean I can't read either?"

I just looked at her. She says, "so I'm just supposed to lay here in silence?"

"Of course not. We can talk. It's just very one-sided when you're in a book or phone."

"So I offer to cuddle and you have all of these stipulations."

"I only asked for you to be present."

No idea where to go from here. I'm so desperately trying to avoid blowing up our lives, but I'm nearing the end of my rope.

41HLM and 40LLF. October will be 20 years of marriage. DB goin on 11 years. Dying for 5 years before that. The last time we had sex she got pregnant with our 2nd child who turns 10 in October.

I am being cucked by a Kindle.